The Illusion of Loneliness
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It’s amazing how often we separate ourselves creating this sense of me vs. the world. People cry out all the time to be rescued from this self-induced loneliness, and the rescuers are all around them. We are born with an innate deep rooted connection to other people, but all of us manage to forsake this very early in our lives. Perhaps that is our true purpose, the search for that deep connection, that energy we all share. The people who have found it are all around us and are more often than not working hard to help others in their search. But it is us who has to take the first step away from our ego and open our senses to the help being offered. Sometimes, as in my case, the help offered is appreciated only in hindsight, but it is help nonetheless.
Which brings me to Kurt Elling, who I had the fortune to meet after a concert in Graz, Austria. The few words that I spoke with him and the few more I heard him speak revealed him to be a man of great insight and peace. Only now do I fully appreciate the things he spoke of. But it is through his music and poetry that he truly speaks, and the message is one of peace, understanding and an ego-less search. Not to mention the fact that his music is beautiful and amazingly sophisticated.
Resolution - Kurt Elling
God - king above all other gods - lead us now, so we can walk wherein the
prophets said that we would trod.
Buddha - tell a sutra like a spell - teach us well to answer silence with the calling of bells.
Allah - bring us to a good alarm - subjugate our wills to answer you like a mighty arm.
Elohim is a pillar of light in the dark and leading all his people to light (for
He’s the king of the fire).
He brings the fire into everything that’s living on earth, in the sun, in the
stars.
Take a spark of it - deep within you - put it to the test - it will do the rest -
I confess - It will be like
climbing up Mount Everest - I can’t express the view from there - but it’s
for you to follow through.
Lama - show the Power’s bright array - bless the climb, and settle peace upon the universe’s dark display.
And Jesus - remember every promise made - Present yourself in the middle of the prayers that we say.
Vishnu - preserve us all along the way - Keep us clear of the final thunderbolt of the judgement day.
Hear me - Hear what I - what I ask for today - Fathers.
Way off at the far leftern shelf of the world - up in a house right on the edge of everything - where the time is tumbling in a vortex - the nexus of timetable tides - in the final lighthouse at shining earth’s ending - at the spinning of the finishing of sweeping time - driving silence like a stampeding careening wash in charging advance
digging the sound of passing everything away into the secret of eternity’s pivot dance
breaking down crashing doorways - bashing through dreamplace - smash, unlash, efface - everything goes
to the open mouth of Kali-ma - where the vault of heaven opens
a witness as lonely as forgotten tears keeps up a vigil watching all - even light - go out one witness - one child digging the slaving wheel of meat spitting out - taking up - everything - by the roots pulling out - the lot of what has passed into the past, like a dream.
she knows what is gone - gone over - everyone that is done - and unbegun and starting from the super-microcosmic no bug all the way to super-huge galactic suns - and she knows the
beginning - is coming in the sweep at the end of all. Even gods have passed over, away. Then, one day the shadow of a priest on the horizon appeared.
He wasn’t taken up into the swirling.
He walked with purpose, all the while digging his heels into the bedrock like a man.
But as he came into view the witness saw his eyes were crying.
Tears like blood fell to earth - as he watched heaven disappear in the void - up the drain into the paraboloid - realizing it all - everything -everywhere -into his eyes - seeing that all - he had beloved - went out of itself and away - here in this last ever surge of a day tearing all meaning away - and to the witness’s indifference he had this to say:
“I know about birth. I know about death, and how the light goes out of men - the life departing - powerless
giving it up - but in the vast indifference I invent a deeper meaning.
I’m the one who will say ‘use the will every day or go mad trying - go to war against the impotent side of living.
Use every power your given to stand and act like a man.
And pray — every day to every god - strike the bowl of heaven and the ringing will become a law.
Build - bridges where you need to go - bring the fire of enlightenment here to life below.
Speak - mercy to the things you meet - listen up to hear the whispering of the blood you bleed.
Stay awake - no mistake - dance the dream awake - and awake.”
Even Kurt Elling needs to be silly sometimes. But when he is, he does it through cool acapella harmonies, complex polyrhythms all accompanied by himself and his finger snapping. The Uncertainty of the Poet - Kurt Elling
The painting accompanying this exceptionally long post is by none other than me myself and whatever else resides in me. It’s pretty rudimentary but it’s a start. It’s called: Good things come in threes.
Have a peaceful evening,
Nick
